Thursday, March 11, 2010

The mocking, blinking cursor

Sometimes, I really do not feel like blogging. And I know I'm not the only one as I frequent my favourite blogs only to find them not updated as well.

I'll be curled up in bed with a steaming cup of coffee, reading a book when I realise that it has almost been a week. Time for a new post. I will have absolutely no idea what to write about, I won’t even feel like carefully crafting a sentence together in my head, but I’ll sit there and force my way through until I’ve produced a post.

I find that lately I am at a loss for words. The normal flow I have grown accustom to has vanished into thin air. Searching around the darkest corners of my mind, I grow tired and frustrated. More often than not, I stop before I even start because I am afraid to fail. Garbage. Why can I only write garbage. Its demoralising. All my sentences sound the same, if not plagued with grammatical errors.

There’s no cadence, no rhythm, no definable voice. I suck.

Right now, the blank white pages scare everything out of me. This is partly due to the amount of things I want to write about, I have so many things I'd like to share with you - its volume increasing everyday and yet it is still bottled up inside of me due to a few reasons.

But then again, there is this feeling - sometimes I just don't feel like writing and telling you, relating my thoughts to you. Or maybe, I'm just too tired from the amount of obligations forced upon me.

Dear blog, when will my enthusiasm for you return back to me?


Amy Fareena said...

hahhaha.. if u suck. then i suck worse. LOL!!!

i'm going thru that same phase too. i used to have 1 post daily. but now i barely have 1 post a week. and one worth-to-be-read post comes ones in a blue moon. hahhahahah....

anyways... i do love your blog

Evana said...

hehehe. nolah its of no good anyways.

thankyou!! :):) :)

Diyana Shah said...

yes evana, i agree with amy. keep writing please :)

btw i've been through that phase one too many times already. but knowing that people still do come and visit, thats what that keeps me going. hehe.

& comments are a bonus. hehe