Friday, October 16, 2009

When I Feel Frustrated

When life decides to come down on you, grab you by the collar, pin you up against the wall with its fist in your belly, what are you instinctively compelled to do?
For some, medicament may come to them in the form of retail therapy and for some, Modern Warfare 4.
So, when the mind is dwelling in a place not quite befitting, I resort to a few things to help me coax it back to the path it squandered away from.

1.
We take pictures! Even though my room is severely lacking in aesthetics, I snap away only to find myself deleting everything 5 minutes later. Redundant? Tell me about it! :)

2. We read!
One of my favourite places to unwind is the bookstore or the library. Sadly, I haven't been doing much of that, here in Moscow. It is so hard to get things done around here, I tell you. Usually, we read a few pages and then the book ends up 5 metres away on the floor for me to find, an hour later once I wake from my siesta.

3.Ok, so this is only what I do at night when the Ulitsa Azovskaya traffic stops being a pain in the ischioanal fossa. Nothing soothes me more than a chill eyepack, scented candles and Debussy capering in my ears.
My psychology lecturer mentioned that a flame is a very apt way of ridding one's self of stress. 'Be one with the flame..' I'm sorry but it didn't quite get to me because I spent half the lecture trying with all my might to pry my eyelids open. So I can't really explain the mechanics behind it :) bahhh.... But apparently it works!

4. We Skype! One of the more perfect remedies for a sullen psyche is a skype session with the people we love. Be it mummy, daddy, sister, cat, brother, aunty, uncle, friend, best friend, boyfriend, girlfriend, whoever. Who knew how much a few minutes of company with the people who know you best can do for one. It is calming to know that there are many that are ready to listen, ready to help, ready to 'virtual hug' and ready to love. This just goes to show that distance barely affects relationships and friendships. hmmm? uhhuh.

5. We run! Okay, I admit that I this is one of the tougher things to do because of the weather, lack of stamina-both mental and physical and also a severe lack of drive. Yesterday, I found myself running. Running for an hour to Varshavskaya, back to Kahov, to Nakhimovskiy Prospekt and back to Kahov. Strange analogy dont you think? I dont want to seem as if I'm running from my problems but the uptempo beats from the ipod pulsating in your ears, the sweat trickling down your back and the wind in your face is strangely therapeutic. As the breeze hits my face, I feel like I'm running through my life, reevaluating everything and feeling everything as it goes by me. Making me realise that there is much left to be done, propelling my drive to greater heights leaving no gray area in my sentiment, only black and white with a deifnite margin between the two. So, run for clarity!

6. We get in touch with our inner gastronomic artists! Well, ok at least we try to. A spoonful of smile, a cup of joy and a pinch of love can never ever go wrong :)

7. We sing, we laugh, we dance and we cry. Yesterday after my jog, the rush of endorphins tangled with the troubled mind of mine made me make the most of my empty room. So I got on my feet, blast the ipod on max and danced like a crazy jellyfish to All American Rejects, The Turtles, Taylor Swift and Demi Lovato! (major loser, im sry) Singing to the bouts of I Wanna Touch You and La La Land, my emotions were allowed to run rampant, unrestrained, unleashed. One moment, I found myself smiling from ear to ear, laughing. I never thought it was possible for me to feel the exact opposite the very next second, and sure enough, it happened. The next chain of events came as suddenly and swiflty as it came. The beats and the whirl of the motions, picked me up in its vortex, lifted my feet of the ground and I caught myself forgetting every bit about the world for about 3 minutes. When I finally stopped to allow some air into my lungs, the world seemed to be just the same as it was before. What was I expecting from all that singing and dancing? I figured that the world will never change its ways for you, neither will people. You simply have to bend around them and run parallel to what is right.

8. We play the guitar! At least I try to, yet again. I attempt to do many things but shamefully failing at most of it. My endless fascination with the instrument extended till I recently constantly find myself strumming (I dont think you can even call it strumming, Scratching, maybe?) away to tuneless songs in reality but somehow it sounded like Avenged Sevenfold in my head! Delusional. Maybe Synyster Gates walked into my dreams one too many times. Haha. Its wonderful to observe what music can do to people :) Sigh. Next! OH! Try also Catherine Freeny to put you into that wispy mood. (credits to jas for the intro!)

9. We write. In the diary. Let everything out and then curl up on the bed with a hot cup of milo and then we fall asleep :) Self explanatory.

10. We pray. Never forget that you are a pawn in this world, created for a single purpose but sadly enough that purpose has been hazed by the love for all things material. Only He can grant me patience, strength and peace. Remember Him always and He will gladly remember you. No matter how far you astray from the beaten path, adjust your bearings and navigate yourself back to Him because there is where we belong rightfully. In the end, thats where I always find myself, going back to the Book and immersing myself in the most precious gift God has given me. Amin.

Finish I have, rambling about the things I do to patch up my hopelessly frustrated self. Albeit they come short in the interesting and unique department, they always manage to make me feel better about myself and transform my outlook completely. Well.... maybe not always entirely, totally, completely but they are effective to a certain point. :)

Most people would rather be certain they're miserable, than risk being happy.

Lets not be most people shall we?

:)

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