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Why hello :)

As of today, I shall no longer be acquainted with Human Anatomy(well till 4th year, at least)! After three semesters of study, it all summed up to 5 hours in the anatomy department, with everyone giving it their best to reach the goals that they have set for themselves.

No more Thursday bullying sessions by Jana and the gang. No more lazy classes with Svetlana. And especially no more dry bones (so boring). The intense exam atmosphere will definitely be missed - hastened shuffling through papers, the bursts of profanity, the choked-back sobs, forehead creased as if one is hoping for knowledge to magically pop out of their craniums and the wrenching internal screams of those who thought of failing with honor by going in unprepared (especially those who were told they didn't have to take orals and pointing but suddenly had to, but in the end most didnt have to). I have to admit that the feeling I derived from the lecture hall earlier was of acute panic due to the high-pressure environment. Odd. Especially because for whatever reason, being in a classroom (or any academic environment) tends to quickly lull me into a fanciful world of sleepy daydreams, one where I’m roused every five minutes to think about what to have for dinner.

Exams have always been associated with stress and this is an increasingly common problem. From worrying about the most mundane things to being fearful of things that might happen and things that might not, these emotional by-products are an important part of our lives. Through worry and fear our body produces stress.  I'm sure we all find that to be true.

I never thought that I'd be one to fall to the evil of stress. I mean, I go on living my life the way I always have, without putting immense pressure on myself till it unanticipatedly jumps on me. In my case, irritability, fatigue, tension, headaches, chest pains, stomach aches and agitation suddenly became available on the menu. Take your pick :) Only THEN I say to myself "Wow, I must be under a lt of stress! And I never knew." *insert LOL-stupidgirl here* It is the result of dealing with events that are challenging and it upsets my mind's balance. Some of you might know.

Really, stress has a nasty habit of rearing its head when you least expect it. There can be one moment throughout the day where you think you are completely fine and getting on with your day and then the next moment, you have a headache, you feel like tearing your own hair out and snapping at everyone that you come into contact with. This is usually described as stress and it has the capability to completely ruin your day as well as your life if you let it.

Now, I havent exactly opened the Pandora's Box to stressless living but I can tell you that I have a list of things I must and WILL try.

1. Get adequate sleep.
Note to self : No more burning the night away watching Friends. No more oversleeping.
2. Engage in a hobby.
Haven't taken out Monkey in a while. He's collecting dust at the moment. Depressed over the lens I just sold off to a friend. Need the money. Oops?
3. Go on a holiday.
WILL DO!
4. Spend quality time with friends and family
WILL DO TOO! Once I start #3 :)
5. Set realistic and reasonable goals.
I need to run away from frustration and dissatisfaction. Learn to hope for less for that is the thing that is hooking you in right now.
6. Stay optimistic.
Worry less about the things that aren't under your control. Hmm.

In conclusion:

Dear Evana,

Please keep your attitude in a positive mode and it will help you to manage these stressful situations. Look for the positive side of things and assume that people have good intentions. There is no point in burning bridges over something as trifling as 'stress'. Negativity breeds trouble and only makes stressful situations worse, no?

Besides trying to keep God as close to me as possible, this may have helped make the semester go by quickly for me. Once we've got that under control, we'll look forward to sem 2 okay?

Before I end, I would like to note that with the commencement of the VERY brief winter holidays, many are running off to various destinations to let off steam - Malaysia, UK, Germany, France, Sweden, Turkey, Greece, etc. Lets take a well deserved break, congratulate ourselves, celebrate God's gift along with love and friendship, try very hard not to lose passports and come back with refreshed outlooks, shall we?

Take care and enjoy yourselves. :) HAPPY HOLIDAYS!


Much love,
Vanavani

Its 7 am and I shall be sitting for my Histology exam in about an hour and a half.

Why hello!

I reckon you've gathered that in about 90 minutes I will be sweating my palms off trying to identify slides and probably failing to do so. My preparation has been nothing less than comforting and now is not the time for regret. Its the time to worry. Shaites.

I hate the word 'stress'. I sincerely do. I think that it is highly overrated and its use is frequently abused. BUT, it has come to my understanding that worry is in fact a component of stress, and this 'worry' will not give me peace. Lets face it, it's human nature to be greatly sensitive and I can be easily affected by worry. ATM, at 7 a.m. I am struggling hard trying to sustain peace in a matter that can help me to see clearly and remember I have options (with the exception of Histo). Well, even if I don't, a clear mind without worry can ensure faith and hope for a better day and time to come.

But if we allow for such worry to determine our fate, we might fail completely. So I thought, 'Hey lets give it a shot!' So that is why:

1. I am trying to practice some form of relaxation. Take up something small to occupy, yet enough to entertain your thoughts. My options include aromatherapy, coffee, Ross, Joey, Chandler, Monica, Rachel and Phoebe!
2. Write! Penning or typing out the very thing that is bothering you and stressing you out can be a very unique, yet common and effective way to eliminate negative thoughts and also find out what you really need.
3. Motivate! Worry is actually a pretty good source of motivation, don't you think? Well, that is if you are willing to inspect it unswervingly as so without being up to one's ear in dramatic consequences.

I am trying my absolute hardest to make sense of my words right now after a whole night of zero sleep. On that account, I shall go shower, have biscuits and HISTO!

Bye!

ResoluWHAT

Many people, myself alike, fancy the idea of starting the new year with a host of resolutions. Duck soup some may say. But to others, hmmm not quite. We resolve to wake an hour earlier, or to devote Saturday afternoons to Anatomy. We resolve to watch less movies, pick up a new hobby, eat more healthily and even (crazily) focus our attention away from studying for piats and avtos.

Most of us fail entirely and spend too much time on our bottoms mourning our losses.

The year 2009 has been a great one although I may have been walking on eggshells for some part of it. But mostly, it has been an amazingly fulfilling year. Thumbing through my diary, I caught myself laughing inwardly at the silly things that the 2009 Evana had the pleasure of doing. Sure enough, 5 minutes later - I reached some depressing part in my diary and strangely, the feeling that bathed me was entirely different.

I felt fine.

Regrets are inevitable but I was fine with regret. I was fine with the way I behaved, the way I felt, because ultimately, they are all in the past. I could hate the Evana that dealt with that certain so and so situation, but where would that hate take me? Not a very pretty place, I presume. If I were given the chance to experience 2009 again, I would have to say nothanks :)

So what do we do now? We could, say...... check off the resolutions that we have managed to live up to, make new resolutions and try live the next year trying to live up to our new resolutions. ajkdfadfgaklh BLERGH.

Anyways, this year I have decided to take a counter-intuitive approach to some of my resolutions. It's kind of a homeopathic remedy, and like most people who turn to homeopathy, I am desperate and not sure it will work. Here they are:


Previous resolution: To supress the need to shop. Mostly for unnecessary things like bags and shoes and jackets.

New resolution: To encourage the need to shop. Mostly for whatever.

Clearly, I have to start making attainable resolutions. But there is a simple logic behind this. The more you are told NOT to have this one thing, the more you yearn for it. So, this year. Go wild Vans, lets see how far you can go before you trip and fall on your big bumbum. -.-

Next!


Previous resolution: To write decently.

New resolution: To write as horribly as you can.

How can one be expected to write decently with Doris Lessing and John Milton staring at you from the bookshelf!


Previous resolution: To eat more healthily.

New resolution: To eat whatever the stomach wants to eat.

I am very well aware of the very evident genetic lineage of coronary disease and diabetes which exists within the family and it is true what they say, you are what you eat. But I choose to believe that I should enjoy eating healthy food rather than eating it because its good for me. So by the end of the year, I should crave tofu burgers :)

Ok, we might have to rethink this.



So there you have it, the more superficial resolutions I have on my list for the coming year. Will I hold my end of the word? We shall see. If by the end of 2010, I end up penniless, on the hospital bed with a thrombic stroke with zero ability to string words to justify my situation, then we will then have the authorisation to use the word...

fail.


The remaining of my resolutions are slightly more intimate, involving conscience and sentiments and that,

are only for those who care.


Merry New Year :)
xxox